Monday, October 06, 2008

Agoraphobia Are Us....snort

My better half (snort) advised me yesterday we have a little perfunctory supper we are to go to at our church next week. Since the moment he mentioned it my stomach has been in knots. So today, I've been doing some reading up on Agoraphobia. There is a lot of information out there, which causes me to believe there must be a lot of people like me out there. Bless their little hearts.

I have always tried to pinpoint when this problem first came up for me. I always thought I used to be fairly sane, but in the past just under 10 years, this has made a huge impact on my life.

While reading one article, the memory of the first (?) episode slapped me right in the face! I was standing in line at a store, waiting to pay. I don't remember when it was, but I do remember the instance I first recognized the extreme discomfort of being in public.

Looking back I can see my grandmother out in public...twisting and twiddling her fingers together...folding and unfolding a hankerchief...wiping sweat off her face...her hands shaking as she would hand the clerk cash to pay for her purchase. I did not have this problem back then, I felt sorry for her but I didn't really understand.

Grandmother did NOT do "SUPPERS" ! I am 48 years old, I think I have paid my dues. I'm not doing suppers anymore either.


1 comment:

Raine said...

so what happens to you when you go out?