Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Still Hanging On

I'm still alive. Back to work today after 4 weeks MLOA. I've never been so bad I had to be put out of work until now. Not ready to come back but no choice unless I want to risk losing my position.

On Seroquel at 300mg. It is very sedating for me even tho I take it at night. I'm going to give it a couple of weeks more but it has to get better for me to stay on it.

Also on Pristiq 50 & Lamictal 200.

Ativan did nothing.
Klonipin (sp?) did nothing.
Tranxene made me feel "weird" so I quit taking that.

The anxiety has eased about 40% I'd say. The depression about 50%.

Sometimes I think all I have left is 20 more years of major depression minus 50%. Can't ever seem to get any better than that. It is only slightly better than wishing you wouldn't wake up.


Raine said...

Are you taking regular Seroquel or Seroquel XR?

Just me said...

I am taking the XR.

Raine said...

try taking it at like 5 or 6 P.m.? then you can sleep alot of it off before you go to work. Of course your doctor probably already told you this and I am putting my foot in my mouth

Just me said...

He did tell me 3 hours before bedtime but I might try 4 hours earlier.

Work is bad. In addition to the crying and the almost constant anxiety and anger, I'm making stupid mistakes on stuff I've been doing for years. Someone called last week wanting our mailing address and I had o look it up!!!!!!!!!!! I've been here almost 10 years!!!

Raine said...

The depression and meds will combine to make you "spacey". Doesnt help any I know. I hope you are stabilizing and can enjoy your christmas